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cap, captain miss america
so i need to go to a particular store to purchase something for someone's christmas present, but the L isn't running and it's too far to goddamn walk in snow.


people are seeming pessimistic about this whole saddam thing and what it means for the democrats, but let me just point out to everyone that bush has already spent hundreds of thousands of dollars making ads about how we still have terrorists to catch.

oh, wait.

that's right, we went after a despot instead of the terrorist we were *supposed* to be going after. so we do still have terrorists to catch.

people are asking what we can do with saddam that won't turn him into a martyr. may i suggest:

1) house arrest in texas
2) making him dye that beard white and play santa for needy children. right on time for the holidays!
3) apologize for accusing him of all that WMD stuff. make him apologize for sending that pretzel after bushy.

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What will happen: they'll make a nice deal with him. He gives them information, Bush gets re-elected, Saddam gets "put to death" on a nice island somewhere under minimal guard where he can live on the beach until he dies.
Life is grand!

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