August 20th, 2002

cap, captain miss america

pity me.

i got my period a couple days early and totally abruptly, no warning signs or anything. which means i'm wearing cute new panties with little kittens on them and the poor kittens are going to look like a bloody mess. and *then* i got the cramps, full on. and *then* my right hip decided that right now was a good time to hurt when i walk, for no apparent reason. my painkillers aren't working and my hip hurts too much to go buy chocolate to alleviate the problem.

and i have a stiff neck.

rosie signed on but then disappeared. i'm sure she got kicked off her computer or something. it made me super sad because aiko and jammy were going to talk. aiko misses jammy and she needs to have a friend again badly. *and* orrie and jammy *were* talking. all so sad. rosie, i miss you!

and now i feel like crap and i just want to curl up in a little ball. ouchies.
cap, captain miss america

(no subject)

you know, there are truly a lot of people in the world who are walking stereotypes. and sometimes that means they're really pretty, because in order to be the perfect walking stereotype, you have to be the prerfect example of whatever stereotypical look you're trying to pull off, so you're gorgeous, but you're still a walking stereotype. you look like a photo in a magazine or catalog. and you write exactly what people expect to see in your journal to the point that yes, if you ever died, someone could write an algorithm to keep filling out your journal till the end of time and no one would really know you were gone except for the fact that you somehow were no longer posting all those pretty pretty pics of yourself, looking just like the epitome of style you are. and i think, at least if all i do is write stupid random crap in here, i'll be unpredictable to the point that i defy the algorithm.

sometimes i think i would like to go out and buy an entire wardrobe of whatever walking stereotype strikes my fancy that day, but, dears, i don't have "the look." don't get me wrong, i don't think i'm un-pretty, though i don't think i'm the gorgeousest girl in the world, but i will never fit anybody's idea of a steretype no matter how hard i try. there is no walking stereotype that requires naturally curly red hair, besides frieda from peanuts, because it's too hard to get. little dark-haired bobs will always be a key component of someone's stereotype because seven out of ten people can get them. tattoos can be a part, but lovely massive scars will never be. too hard to get. it doesn't matter what i define myself as, if i wear clothes that are anything besides nondescript, i never look like i belong the the group defined by that fashion; i look like some shmoe dressing-up-as. and i think i always will.