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GHETTO MALLOMAR, THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE
bawkbawk
teaberryblue
teaberryblue: I FOUND GHETTO PEEPS.
quizzicalsphinx: Do they have bling?
teaberryblue: Actually, they do.

Welcome to the world of the Marshmallow Pal, the Peeps' inbred bastard cousin.


These are them: The Marshmallow Pals. How can you pass up something that tries to out-peep the Peeps?

Their colors aren't as vibrant as peeps, but they appear to be wrapped similarly, in a little cardboard container with plastic stuff around them.

They are MARSHMALLOW WITH ICING DECORATION.

But under the plastic-box combo is ANOTHER plastic wrapper.

And then, once they're out of the second layer of plastic, they HAVE A PLASTIC TRAY. Man, these things could pretty much singlehandedly fill a landfill.

This is the only female of the four candies, a pink bunny with flowers. I think she's like the hootchie Smurfette of the Marshmallow Pals.

DELICIOUS



Then there is a boy bunny, who looks like he's meant to be purple, but he's actually more...gray. Actually, he could be a she. Or a hermaphrodite. There aren't any real gender labels on this one.




Then there is the first chick-duck thing. I think this one is supposed to be a duck because he is dressed like a sailor. A gay duck. I keep expecting him to start singing "June is Bustin' Out All Over."




This one is my personal favorite, and I've named him Leroy. He's another chick-duck thing, but he has more of a chick beak than the gay sailor duck-chick.

Leroy just has a nasty look on his face. I think he's the villain of the Marshmallow Pals

Also he has a mean bowtie. You don't mess with Leroy.




Biting into them, the frosting is kind of hard and the sugar tastes a little like food coloring. But on the inside, they are squishier than Peeps, which was a pleasant surprise. Here you can see the gooshiness of Smurfette!pal

In keeping with the grand old tradition of Peep Research, I had to see how the Pals stood up to at least one of the classic Peep tests. No explosion in the microwave-- the Gay Sailor Pal melted nicely at under 30 seconds at 50% power in the microwave. The frosting stood up to the heat, however.


I am happy to report that Melted Pal is quite delicious and they melt into a very consistent creamy goo, although I recommend a spoon for Melted Pal eating.

I would consider biting the heads off the Marshmallow Pals again! No real replacement for Peeps, though.

However, I may purchase another package to keep. I miss Leroy and his scheming ways.

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So THAT'S what they mean by "YO WHERE'S MAH PEEPZ!?"

Next up: Delicious Marshmallow Homiez.

Aww, they're cute. They look too much like actual living things for me to be able to eat.

But they're so delicious!

IT CAN'T BE A MALLOMAR WITHOUT THE CHOCOLATE COATING AND COOKIE BASE>

I KNOW BUT NOTHING ELSE RHYMED WITH GHETTO SUPERSTAR.

THEY ARE REALLY GHETTO PEEPS.

I don't get what makes them ghetto. Educate me!

They are not real Peeps! They are funny off-brand Peeps masquerading as peeps!

THIS IS THE BEST POST ON ELJAY.

EVER.

:)

It likes you too! Except for Leroy. He is coming for you in your sleep.

Peeeeeeps omg. I love those things.

Pals! Not Peeps! They are by a company called "Frankford" and are no relation to Mr. JustBorn Chickie and Mr. JustBorn Bunny.

But they are awesome

Hahahaha, June is Busting out All Over! My school is definitley doing that for our spring musical. I will think of the gay duck sailor and his ghetto palz every time I sing that song, now.

JUST BECAUSE IT'S JUNE, JUNE, JUUUUUNE!


This entry made me laugh so hard with it's absurdity.

I love that you gave us a play-by-play. XD

I felt it was important FOR SCIENCE.

Cuuuuute. I like Leroy the best too.

I am also somewhat attached to Gay Sailor Chick-Duck. In my head, he had a cruel lover's quarrel with Leroy and Leroy in his malevolent way fooled GSCD's into the microwave on the pretense of making up with him.

The whole thing was really a plot of Leroy's to get access to GSCD's inheritance. He never loved him.

I love this post and all subsequent comments. Intensely. My personal favorite is the Hermaphrodite purple-gray bunny. You have woefully ignored him on this page.

I'm just trying to respect his/her/its/hir/zir lifestyle choices, man.

I need to share this with people. The world must know.

Haha, please do! It's public!

GSCD's microwave photos are creepy. I feel like he's just there trying to say "Why have you done this to me!!!!!!" "I'm meeeellllttttinnnnggg."

And we thought Judy Garland was the one he wanted to be.

I would be way too scared to eat those.

Wow, you picked the peep with the perfect expression to microwave. Best LJ post this month!

Wrapped in plastic!

Man, those things could launch a Lynch movie all by themselves.

LET'S FUCK! I'LL FUCK ANYTHING THAT PEEPS!

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