tea berry-blue (teaberryblue) wrote,
tea berry-blue
teaberryblue

LJ Idol Week 15: "Failure to Communicate"




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Transcript

I remember where I was on September 26, 2008. I was sitting in the back seat of my mother's car, crocheting, and we were listening to a radio news program on a long car trip-- I suspect it was to or from my grandparents' house, but I don't quite remember that part.

In between relating the traffic report and whatever else the news announcer was talking about-- probably the presidential election-- came the phrase, "and today we have lost an American icon."

This wasn't so long after Teddy Kennedy had been diagnosed with brain cancer and received his grim prognosis, so my immediate reaction was that Kennedy must have succumber to his illness.

But it wasn't Teddy Kennedy. It was Paul Newman, American Actor, age 83.

I was so not ready for that.

Paul Newman was super old. He was older than my grandma. I mean, he was old enough that his death was not super surprising. But, see. The thing that you have to remember is that even if he was 83, he was the HOTTEST 83-year-old man ever. Ever.

I saw Paul Newman once at the theater. I mean, at the theater, in person, not at the theater in the sense that I was viewing one of his films, although I am not ashamed to say that I have seen many, many, many of his films. I don't remember what play it was, but I do remember seeing Paul Newman. Because he was just that hot. Paul Newman was my wake-up call, my voice in my head reminding me that old men can be sexy. Really sexy. And they can race stock cars. Heck yes, they can run their roadsters in circles on dirt tracks from morning till night, and there's nothing you can say about it because, by god, they're eighty-three and, in the words of Paul Newman himself, Holy Christ, whadya know! They're still around!

So I wanted to take this moment to remember some of the hot shit that Paul Newman did during his lifetime:

--Drank the shit out of some booze. Because he was too hot even for Liz Taylor.1
--Founded the shit out of Israel.2
--Won the shit out of some pool.3
--Escaped the shit out of some chain gangs.4
--Shot the shit out of some Bolivian Cavalry.5
--Exploded the shit out of a burning building.6
--Accidentally bankrolled the shit out of the invention of the motherfucking hula hoop.7
--Raced the shit out of some cars.8
--Dressed the shit out of some salads.9

And that is not all. But that is all I have room for on one sheet of paper.

Damn that was one sexy, sexy old man.





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If you are wondering how this relates to the topic for the week, please visit this link.

This entry was written for therealljidol Week 15: Failure To Communicate
Tags: comics, lj idol
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